After posting a video, a friend of mine gave me some feedback and my initial feeling was she isn’t being supportive. The next day she gave me more of the same feedback which brought up the familiar energy of being misunderstood and judged. I wanted to hear something more descriptive, different, deeper from her. My thoughts went into defense mode.
“Our interaction triggered old narratives and made me unreceptive to any feedback from her. ”
Our interaction triggered old narratives and made me unreceptive to any feedback from her. You see, over the years we’ve become distant due to the space I needed to get to know my shadow and grow through spiritual awakenings.
After discussing the interaction with my husband, he said a word to me that resonated in my spirit, adversarial. In a nutshell, he described the unresolved tension that exists in many black women’s relationships. I took some time alone in my special place to breathe it in.
“…my response to the energy I encounter is a mirror reflecting what’s within.”
As the hot water ran down my back, Spirit reminded me that my response to the energy I encounter is a mirror reflecting what’s within. I realized there was an adversarial spirit within me surfacing to be healed. I shifted my perspective from focusing on the friend story to seeing my adversarial self and understanding her deficit. I began to Mother her by honoring her experiences and affirming the things she needed to hear from me to feel safe, loved, and understood. I sang her a love song and massaged her pain.
After releasing and healing, the blessing came through. I was now in a receptive place, able to receive the lessons presented to me. I felt more secure which allowed me to switch my focus from what wasn’t in the feedback to what was. I was grateful for the feedback that was given which inspired me to create something new. I inhaled, gave thanks for the awareness, and sent my friend a genuine thank you. I passed another test.
“After releasing and healing , the blessings came through.”
As you evolve and step more into your light, the narratives and blocks that no longer sustain you will be revealed to you for healing. Be aware that your experiences are an opportunity to grow no matter what your ego says, be open to receiving the messages that come in the form of perceived adversaries, and align with self-love before approaching any situation. I encourage you to stay in prayer and develop a self-love practice that will guide you to the truth of the matter within.
Much Love,
Lenise
