In my previous article entitled, “Sexual Evolution”, I wrote about the natural human desire for physical intimacy. It is understandable that when we hear the word “intimacy”, we automatically think it applies to our sense of touch. As we will now discover, that is not always the case. In this article, although I continue to explore our desire for intimacy, I choose to approach it through a different sensation.
In my upcoming novel entitled, “The Disheveled King”, there is a chapter in which I write about the power of listening, not, however, the type of listening that most of us are accustomed. I am referring to a type of listening that is so satisfying that I have given it a name. I call it “intimate listening”.
It may sound strange but have you ever observed yourself when you are listening? Who is actually doing the listening? The next time you are listening to someone or something, observe yourself. You may find that you are simply interpreting what you are hearing through your screen of memories and beliefs, which is much different than actually listening.
As I write this article from my southern California residence, I comfortably lounge on a day bed, basking in the scattered rays of sunlight that peer down upon me through the towering oak trees. Prompted by the tranquil atmosphere, I begin to practice the very subject I am writing about. With eyes closed, I attempt to remain present and listen to the sounds of nature. But sure enough, my thoughts find their way into the mix and proclaim, “I know what that is… That is a bird singing in a tree, those are leaves rustling in the wind, that is the sound of water gently trickling in a stream.”
Although this is enjoyable, it is not truly listening, this is interpreting the present through the past. By observing the movement of my thoughts, I become aware that I am indeed interpreting the sounds of nature through the filter of my memory. This realization, however, leads to something extraordinary. I have become aware of being aware. No longer am I only aware of what I know; I am now awareness itself. In this present moment I am beyond what I know; it is here that I experience the sanctity of intimate listening.
Unchained from the incessant chatter of the mind’s recollections, I am finally silent enough to listen to the truth of the present.
Did you know that the words silent and listen use the same letters? Ponder that for a moment.
Knowledge is essential, but knowledge is always a thing of the past. Once something is known, it becomes a memory. Yet, when we experience the infinitude of inner silence, we gain freedom from the known, making it possible for us to receive the gift of the present moment, and the sacred truth contained within it.
The brilliant, yet stoic Indian philosopher, J. Krishna Murti, explained it quite simply when he said, “A cup is only useful when it is empty.” You cannot put something new into a vessel that is filed with the old.
Unfortunately, most of us have been misled to believe that the ultimate form of intelligence is measured by the amount of knowledge one has acquired. When an individual attempts to listen exclusively through their screen of knowledge, not only do they fail to receive the deeper meaning of what is being transmitted, but they become a prisoner of their very own knowledge. By “prisoner of knowledge” I mean not being free to listen to the truth of the present moment.
Knowledge is of paramount importance in our time-space reality, but as we just discovered, being a thing of the past, knowledge must not be allowed to taint the present moment. Only after intimate listening takes place, without the interference of the past, can we call upon the power of knowledge to help us decipher the data we’ve received. The order of these events is crucial.
Most scholars would vehemently disagree with the very idea of freeing themselves from their knowledge due to the fact that their identities are so closely tied to it. I believe this type of limited thinking creates a false sense of identity. Have you ever tried having a conversation with someone whose knowledge, education, degrees, beliefs, nationality, and religion are so engrained in the fabric of their identity that they are unable to hear anything contradictory, no matter how compelling? If you have, then you are not alone.
Superiority is the mask of insecurity. When individuals believe that their identity is founded on their credentials, profession, race, religion, and education, they often display a superior, defensive persona and refuse to listen to any data that differs with their belief system. They unconsciously fear that if they do so, everything they have based their life upon may be exposed as trivial and come tumbling down. I call it a “false” sense of identity because our true identity, which is our essence, can never be destroyed, thus there is nothing to defend.
So the question remains, what is our true identity?
We are conscious, spiritual beings having a physical experience, not physical beings having a conscious, spiritual experience. Quantum physics has revealed that we are all vibrational beings at our core. We translate everything, including words, from a vibrational level onto a material level with the use of our senses. So in essence, we are all vibration translators. Most conflicts and misunderstandings are derived from a vibrational barrier, not a language barrier. That is why even individuals who speak the same language very often have a complete communication breakdown.
So what is the solution?
First, I will tell you what it is not. Clearly, we can now see that it serves no purpose to attempt communication when we are vibrationally unaligned, therefore, demanding to be heard is not the solution. To have true understanding, we must open our heart, use the power of intimate listening, and feel our way into alignment with whomever we wish to communicate. Once this is achieved, communicating becomes euphoric. Indeed, communicating with someone who has total freedom to hear what we are saying, is pure communion, which is the ultimate connection.
Intimate listening not only reveals the infinite intelligence of vibrational reality, but it makes all of our relationships meaningful and profoundly satisfying. The choice is always ours to make. Intimate listening can be used in the most casual or profound way. It can be used with acquaintances, friends, co-workers, lovers, family, and even our so called enemies.
As the sun slowly sets in the west, I conclude this article with one last question. Who would you most like to communicate with on the deepest level? How about yourself?
Use intimate listening every day and you will hear the present moment guiding you into alignment with who you truly are – a joyful, spiritually aligned, deliberate creator of your own reality.
HERE ARE FIVE QUICK CONVERSATIONAL EXERCISES YOU CAN PERFORM:
1) Prepare to communicate.
If time permits, and it will if you make it a priority, meditate for at least 15 minutes before you engage in a deliberate conversation. Open your heart and raise your vibratory rate to the highest possible level. Doing this will not only protect you from negative energy, but it will provide a positive experience for both you and whomever you choose to communicate with. There is a humorous, yet powerful ancient saying that suggests the following, “Meditate at least once a day, and if you don’t have time to do so, meditate twice a day.” LOL.
2) Observe how you feel when you communicate.
When you communicate, allow yourself to feel the vibrational meaning behind the words you are speaking and hearing. Always remember to take full responsibility for your feelings. Never give your power away by blaming others for the way you feel. If you do not like the way you feel while conversing, you can always politely end the conversation. There is no Universal Law, at least none that I am aware of, that says you cannot end a conversation if you so desire.
3) Communicating is not about winning!
While communicating, if you begin to argue and feel like you’ve won by making a point that supports your own belief, in actuality all you’ve done is inflate your ego. The only thing you’ve accomplished is that you have convinced the other person that you are not capable of communicating. The purpose of communicating is not about winning; it is about connecting. If your goal is to win, I suggest joining a debate team.
4) Enjoy and appreciate the conversation.
Communicating is one of the most inspiring and intimate things we can do when it is done with an openness to hear and be heard. Take a moment to be thankful for having the opportunity to connect. When we enjoy conversing, our message is usually received with clarity, and that is the whole point of speaking. Talking to someone is different than talking at someone. Be kind!
5) Let them know they’ve been heard.
Remain centered and balanced when you listen; doing so will enable you to hear the vibrational meaning behind the words being spoken. After someone has taken time to communicate with you, don’t be in a rush to respond. Take a moment to pause and let them know that they have been heard and understood.
~Daniel Pape
