Dear Deziree,
I would like to know how to end a 3 ½ year long distance relationship with someone whom I care about very much.
I just know he is not a true match for me long term. I have tried to end the relationship, but he doesn’t want to and won’t let go. My feelings and happiness should matter more than his, I know this. However, I have never had a problem ending a relationship until now.
Maybe fear is holding me back, or not wanting to be without someone since before him I wasn’t involved with someone for several years. Perhaps, I still need to be in this relationship to push me. What do you feel?
Much love and light,
Judith
Dear Judith,
Thank you so much for writing in. I have to admit I had to reread this several times to clearly tune into your energy, and finally, it came to me.
I believe what’s holding you back from ending this relationship is the lack of “Self-Love”. You stated that you know that he is not a true match and also that you have not been in a relationship for several years. My feeling is you are not in a place where you are loving and honoring yourself because if you were, you would not stay in a relationship that is not feeding your soul.
Also, he is not keeping you in that relationship, you are. No one has control over us unless we are not able to have healthy boundaries with ourselves. You, my dear, are keeping yourself stuck in this relationship.
I don’t believe the fear of being alone is keeping you in this relationship because you already know that you have gone several years of not being in a relationship and I didn’t feel a sense of urgency when I read that from you.
To address your concern about needing this relationship to push you, I feel it’s the Ego’s way of keeping you locked in a holding pattern to avoid doing the work on clearing the block/belief of not having the “Self-Love” that you need to attract the relationship that will bring you the true happiness that you are looking for.
My advice would be to get clear with yourself about why you should end this and then be completely honest with him. This is showing love for him and” Self-Love” for you. I feel you will have learned a lot about yourself once you take the time to look at this entire relationship from beginning to end.
Now take this wisdom with you when entering a potential new relationship. Best wishes to you and many blessings!
Be Extraordinary,
Kimberly Deziree
The intention of Dear Deziree is to use the intuitive gifts of Kimberly Deziree to give you guidance regarding your spiritual business. As with EVERYTHING in life, we need to take 100% responsibility for ourselves. Her response is meant to give you guidance, but ultimately you are responsible for you. Enjoy!
