Being a first-generation American from hard-working Guyanese parents, I grew up on stories of dad getting his first pair of pants at 13 and the miles he would have to walk before going to school. I was often reminded of the long list of chores and the number of children mom was caring for by the tender age of 9. The value of hard work was instilled in me early and all the time. Rest was considered lazy.
Mom and dad were both entrepreneurs long before social media. By watching them, I was conditioned to put in long hours and create new businesses. When mom wasn’t working, she was constantly multitasking between tidying up, balancing her checkbook, and giving advice over the phone.
“Rest was considered lazy.”
Contrary to my youthful belief that “I would never be anything like my parents”, years later with a family and business of my own, I found myself repeating their patterns. Days became a constant cycle of cleaning up behind the children and fussing about new messes while fulfilling all the roles in my business. Nights became fight club sessions with my guilt about not being present with my family. My mind and heart were not aligned. While my mind’s desire is to be a successful businesswoman, my heart’s desire is for my children to experience me as an emotionally present and peaceful mother.
Hustling between cooking, cleaning, and getting a snack before the next Zoom meeting didn’t exude peace. The visualization of myself through the children’s eyes made me question, “What energy do I bring when I enter the room?”. It dawned on me the narrative of “becoming” had me missing the heavenly glory right in front of me.
In my introspection, the message “create peace by choosing it” came through me. When I acknowledged peace as a choice, my mind opened up to how I could create a new reality. I started to create more peace in my home by choosing to not fill every free moment with a task. I let go of shaming myself for resting and said yes to hiring a team. I wake up earlier to get work done and put down work outside of work hours (No easy feat as a passionate entrepreneur!). While tough but necessary, these shifts have allowed me to be fully present for myself, my family, and my clients. Choosing peace created a reality where I can actually enjoy it all, just not at the same time.
“…be the peace you pray for.”
When I feel myself picking up the phone to do a “quick” work thing or about to start an unplanned cleaning frenzy, I remind the voice in my head I named “mom” about the importance of rest. I remind her that my ancestors put in the hard work so I could live my best life on earth. I repeat the following mantras, “I choose peace. I am Peace. I am Present. I am relaxed in my blessings”, and remember to enjoy the dream. I invite you to use these mantras and hope they help you make the choice to be the peace you pray for.
Much Love,
Lenise
