A unique challenge leaders face when feeling chronically under pressure or dealing with difficult situations is remaining calm, compassionate, and composed FOR the people around them.
This is a problem because evolution-wise, leaders are hard-wired to respond to survival stress with outbursts of controlling, enforcing, commanding orders.
This inherent SURVIVAL response to perceived danger made perfect sense when on a battlefield leading their people into battle.
But in modern society, that kind of leadership will scatter any self-respecting, loyal supporter right out of your domain.
And sadly at home, this behavior creates distance, distrust, and disunity with those you love the most.
So, what to do? You don’t want people to be afraid of you or judge you as non-caring when you really do care and appreciate people, especially the ones you work with.
Yet the survival response triggered in you will override your otherwise respectful & compassionate nature, frustrating you and distancing those you are relating with.
In my studies of human nature and energy system I’ve found that negative stressful experiences last 10x longer in our awareness than pleasure generating experiences . . . because negative experiences trigger our survival.
To help us survive, our bodies come equipped with a fight or flight stress response, so we are ready to fight off danger and survive.
Even though we have no bears chasing us and our physical bodies are not in danger, we do have a barrage of 24/7 invisible threats to our inner self that we must be ready to defend against.
That is what triggers our flight or fight stress response.
This happens to us unconsciously.
The good news is our energy system does have a natural way of dealing with non-physical stress instead of being triggered into a flight or fight commanding enforcer demeanor.
You can access this natural response to emotional threats with a commitment to self-awareness, healing the trigger, and receiving distance healings to balance your inner energy system.
We have an energetic pathway in our endocrine system that is equipped to handle the escalation of force incrementally in kind, respectful ways . . . BEFORE flight or flight kicks in.
This way, instead of losing your cool and feeling ashamed later, you can keep the cool and handle the escalation of non-physical threats in kind, compassionate and considerate ways.
From this place of self-aware calm composure, it’s a lot easier to focus your leadership gifts on mutually beneficial win-win scenarios and thrive.
Also, a focus on the emotions your soul will generate for you will STOP the stress response in its tracks.
I’m not talking about the brain-generated ego joy of winning or reaching your goals.
What I want you to connect with are the expansive feelings your soul is here to generate within you to create and expand with.
I’m talking feelings of limitless freedom, the awe of nature, the gut-expanding fulfillment of seeing your impact make a difference, the timelessness joy of connecting with your children’s pets, and those you love.
Each one of us has our own unique set.
Here’s a quick process you can do to identify YOUR stress dissolving soul emotions at the moment.
Once you’ve identified them, you’ll want to “train” your inner self, to build them in your consciousness, so that they become normal easily accessible assets for your emotional toolbox.
Here’s what I suggest:
Carve out some quiet, reflective time, maybe light a candle, put on soothing music, have your favorite beverage close by.
Sitting straight up with your feet on the floor, close your eyes, put a smile on your face, and feel your sit bones on the chair.
Set your intention by repeating to yourself, “I open to connect with the soul emotions of my childhood”
Make sure you feel both sit bones, have your spine aligned above the center of them, and become aware of the space in-between each sit bone.
Let your shoulders comfortably drop backward to create space and elongate your neck.
In your mind’s eye, journey back to the times in your childhood where you felt the safest, happiest, and most joyful.
For me, it was furiously peddling my turquoise stingray bike into the Santa Ana winds of Orange County California.
It was diving thru a wave about to crash to soar in the air as I flew out its backside.
It was climbing the jacaranda tree in my backyard, feeling the textures of tree bark, the smells of the air, and the beauty of the tiny flowers it bore.
For me, my personal soul emotions are all about freedom. Yours may be about connection, creativity, or just pure appreciation.
The point is to identify and amplify your personal feelings of joy, freedom, and utter happiness in your body, and cultivate them so you can access them on demand.
Let your soul remember them for you so that the next time you feel triggered to power over-enforce and can’t get yourself out of that reactive pattern, you can consciously choose to interrupt yourself and focus on your soul emotions instead.
This simple process will work to break your pattern and regain composure at the moment, but it won’t completely shift your consciousness.
To shift completely from unconscious triggers to conscious compassionate choices, you want to hire someone like me to help you out.
For those of you who find it difficult to access your personal soul emotions, you can send a “Freedom Intention” to your subconscious that will help:
“I open to notice the feelings generated by my soul in the quiet between my thoughts”.
And then be on the lookout for them to emerge!
I truly hope that helps!
As always, post your comment below.
Much love your way.
